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Little things make me smile like a child. It makes my day knowing how lovely the people around me are and I can’t express how grateful I am for each and everyone of them. I know that I don’t express myself very well. I have always been on the receiving end and never giving. It isn’t easy but I’m gna try harder.

Having experienced what work life would be like, I fully understand why people said it would be difficult handling both family and work. I love working and I love being appreciated but that’s it. Everyday is a routine and I seem to be losing myself. It doesn’t fill the gap I feel. It gets wider each day and I think one day, I’ll just lose myself. I’m already starting to feel that I’ve lost part of myself. What should I do to make it better?

This is so much worse than I have imagined it would be and that’s what reality is. It is only fully hitting me now and I wished it would have been better. My internship was the appetizer. Everything went on so smoothly. My colleagues were really nice and kind. It was such a good work place. This, now, is just polar opposite.

I’m starting to question myself, of my goals, and what I would really want in the future. Being an Auditor would be a 100 times, if not, 1000 times tougher than this. “What do I really want in life?” is a really difficult question to answer to.

With love,

_redwildroses

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